I have really strong feelings for my best friend but we're in a complicated situation because he is dating a girl who bullied me really badly. the bullying got so bad i stopped going to school and was really afraid. Nobody knows she bullied me because she did it when nobody was around. shed follow me if i was going to the toilets and id lock myself in the cubical so she couldnt get me. Theyve been dating for just 4 months and every time I even say things to my bestfriend about her he gets defensive. He really likes her and it's making me avoid him because I am scared the bullying is going to start again. he told me hed always have my back but now i dont think he will even believe me that she bullied me.
Asketh - Anonymous
Bullying isn’t a subject to take lightly. If your best friend doesn’t believe you, then you’re going to have to leave him to find out the hard way. I promise you that relationships with girls like her never last long. It won’t be long until your best friend sees her for what she is and then comes apologizing to you. It is then down to you to forgive him or not.
You’ll have to handle this in a really mature way. Be honest about everything and don’t let your fear of his reaction hold back what you tell him. Let out everything to him, calmly. Try to word things that make it seem you’re on his side instead of attacking his girlfriend. If he doesn’t believe you, don’t get angry. Just tell him you knew he wouldn’t and then stop talking to him. Getting angry will just push him away from you and make him not believe you even more.
If you stop talking to him, he’ll be left with his own thoughts. If he never apologizes to you and he ends up never believing you, then he isn’t a best friend. It will be hard to go through if that happens, but you’re better off without someone like him anyway.
I really strongly believe that in just a few months he’ll realise his mistake and come back to you. Guys are pretty blind when it comes to bitchy girls but they find out eventually. As long as you tell him everything maturely and calmly, then I really believe things will be ok.
Good luck x
